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Sunday, April 18, 2010

I'm sorry , who are you again ? entry #21

Hi, I am lady miza ,a name given to me by a man who insist to call me with a different name. Demented_wife is a state of being which I'm in right now after being married for several years. 


nothing much about me when I'm single. was accused as a lesbian when in secondary school, no boyfriend what-so-ever except been in a no-name-relationship with an older man before I got married. 
why ? (did I get married) 


I was considered quite young but actually getting married at 21/ 22 years old is nothing compared to people in village area ... they got married at 18 or 19 years old. nothing surprising. 


I just need a medium to reach my spouse. to tell him how confused I am with what's going on with me and him. he asked me not to compare my life, our lives with others so I try very hard to do so. I haven't failed miserably yet but I did failed. I wish I don't have a brain that can function ... maybe  then I won't asked or analyze or judge. 


I read a story about mayonnaise jar and golf balls and coffee whatnot. the moral of that story is to appreciate the big things in your life, "  The golf balls are the important things - your God, family, your children, your health, your friends and your favourite passions - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full."   

I still have my God, family , children , my health is quite bad, friends ?  ^_^ they endlessly surprise me like chipsmore cookies and finally my favourite passion (wonder what is that!). based on that, it can be concluded that these are my main concerns. 


suddenly I forgot what I want to type ... sigh .. that's all for now

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